Junk Mail

it's piling up!

The more I get these useless ads, 
the less I want to buy.
My junk mail pile is burgeoning!
It makes me want to cry.

Enough with gutter coverings!
Free coupons? I've got lots.
Don't need furniture or autos.
Do I need a burial plot?

Hearing aids? Way too expensive.
Credit cards? I've got a bunch.
Someone thinks that I'm retiring,
so they offer me free lunch!

Don't need pretty address stickers
(pay my bills right from the bank).
The Catholics send me lucky coins?
I'm still Lutheran, I think.

Won't be needing a new dentist,
don't wear fancy jewelry,
no to carpeting or flooring,
new eyeglasses, not for me!

Starving people get donations,
just not every other week.
Skinny puppies, homeless kitties,
constant funding they do seek.

I could use a brand new kitchen
but I cannot stand the mess,
and I don't trust most contractors
so I'm stuck with this, I guess.

You can just forget the cruises
(went to Greece and I got ill).
If it weren't for advertisements
then I'd just be getting bills!